Happy ValentiMe's Side-Chick Day!

Are you getting your side piece the diamonds, chocalates, then the pearl necklace?

Kanye went Kanye again, and his ass-implant girlfriend was there to watch it all, Kim Kumdashian. She is famous for nothing more, than giving a blowie to a singer's brother.

Rap music has become a series of beeps, borps, and vibrations, mixed in with obvious sexual lyrics...and people are going stupid nuts over it. I miss NWA.

Speaking of, NWA has a movie biopic coming out! I'll make sure to bring my .45 in case the reviews aren't good, and people start bussin caps.

Violent crime is going sky-high in downtown San Francisco. Tons of Twitter and Facebook fights are happening, and being posted in Instagram and SnapChat.

Can the NFL network stop analyzing the holy sheep shit out of the super bowl now? Women like football, but can't understand when the players mention nickel defenses, or wedges. Speak slow and stupid for the ladies...you know, right before you rape them in a hotel room.

I can hear it now...the mass-suction sound on Valentine's Night. Millions of blow jobs going down at once.