The Female Solution: What Did You Learn From Your Last Relationship?

In some jobs, when an employee is leaving, they have what is called an "exit interview." Perhaps the employee can evaluate what happened, why they are leaving, what they learned about the company and themselves, what they may do differently on the next job. In relationships, breakups are painful and rarely do people talk to each other in a civil manner to evaluate what went wrong. Both are too busy blaming the other, and therefore, the lessons that could have been learned to help both parties to grow end up being lost. Those men and women who were really emotionally hurt come to the conclusion that the best way to avoid another painful breakup is to avoid an emotionally intimate experience altogether. So, the outcome of this thinking is the gradual shifting in our culture to reflect couples that have sex, have babies, but never fully commit to marriage and family. Those men and women who use birth control have sex and don't have babies, but still don't commit to marriage and family. How do we get past the pain of the past to recreate a culture of marriage and family? Those who are in religious communities that advocate abstinence find themselves secretly having sex, but still not getting married, out of fear of a painful breakup. Or they find themselves in the frustrating circumstance of practicing abstinence year after year after year, with no hope in sight of a relationship, because emotionally scarred men and women are afraid to try again. So, today we help couples evaluate themselves after a breakup in order to heal emotional wounds and learn the lessons from the past in order to be enabled to try marriage again without fear of failure.