The Art of Listening

A riveting discussion between three highly esteemed professionals... on subjects stemming from our founding fathers, illegal wars, emotions, to foreign policy and philosophy. Kinda... you be the judge.

The man who is aware of himself is henceforward independent; and he is never bored, and life is only too short, and he is steeped through and through with a profound yet temperate happiness. © Virginia Woolf

On Listening: Will you please just listen?
When I ask you to listen and you start giving advice, you have not done what I have asked.
When I ask you to listen and you start telling me why I shouldn't feel the way I do, you are invalidating my feelings.
When I ask you to listen and you start trying to solve my problem, I feel underestimated and disempowered.
When I ask you to listen and you start telling me what I need to do I feel offended, pressured and controlled.
When I ask you to listen, it does not mean I am helpless. I may be faltering, depressed or discouraged, but I am not helpless.
When I ask you to listen and you do things which I can and need to do for myself, you hurt my self-esteem.
But when you accept the way I feel, then I don't need to spend time and energy trying to defend myself or convince you, and I can focus on figuring out why I feel the way I feel and what to do about it.
And when I do that, I don't need advice, just support, trust and encouragement.
Please remember that what you think are "irrational feelings" always make sense if you take time to listen and understand me.