Dealing with the Ex/Baby Mama; DRAMA

We need some strategies on how to deal with the still involved Ex and/or Baby Mama. It is not easy to be a Step-Mom and being a "Prison Step-Mom" is even harder at times and if you have to speak to the "other woman" and if you husband speaks to her because of the kids there can be a lot of confusion, jealous and even hate brewing. You as the wife can easily find yourself in a place where you are tearing down your own marriage because of it. THIS IS NOT GOOD. Let's get our thoughts and ideas together on how to best deal with this.