Call in to speak with the host
A decision is made from within... are the choices you are making in alignment with that decision, or are they taking you off course?
How many times do you manipulate someone to get them to fill your need? How many times do you allow yourself to be manipulated into doing something to fill another's need? Neither will ever work... you simply can NOT fill another's need, nor can anyone else!
Where does your self-respect lie?
It's good to talk.