Pregnant and Alone, Doing It Alone

Pregnancy is SUPPOSED to be a special time for you and your partner, and there may be a lot of other people around you who are interested in your baby, such as your parents, sisters, brothers and friends.

People can offer a great deal of help in all sorts of ways, and you'll probably be glad of their interest and support. But sometimes it can feel as if they're taking over. If this is how you feel, it can help everyone if you explain gently that there are some decisions that only you and your partner can make, and some things that you prefer to do on your own.

You may also find that being pregnant puts you on the receiving end of a lot of advice and perhaps a bit of criticism, too. Sometimes the advice is helpful, sometimes not. Sometimes the criticism can really hurt. The important thing is to decide what is right for you. After all, it is your pregnancy and your baby.

Just because you don't have a partner doesn't mean you have to go to antenatal visits by yourself and cope with labour on your own. You have the right to take whoever you like: a friend, sister, or perhaps your mum.

Involve a birth partner if you can, and let him or her know what you want from them. It may help to discuss your birthplan with them so that they understand your wishes for labour. You can also ask your midwife if there are antenatal classes in your area that are run especially for single women.

Think about how you'll manage after the birth. Will there be people around to help and support you? If there's nobody who can give you support, it might help to discuss your situation with a social worker.