The Dash welcomes Jim Melis

Jim was born to a large dysfunctional Greek family in Harlem New York, even his first day in the world was a Greek tragedy. When his father first saw him in the hospital nursery in the baby box marked MELIS, being the product of inbreeding, he was expecting a cute Greek baby boy with a big nose and at least one extra limb. His father was shocked to find a cute black baby boy with a different big body part that looked like an extra limb. His father, angry that the baby didn’t look anything like him, yelled at his wife for obviously having an affair, and threatened to divorce her. Then when his wife convinced him that she had been faithful, he yelled at her mother, for getting around too much and being unfaithful. He concluded that one of her indiscretions must have lay dormant for a generation and popped out with Jim. The drama ensued until a few hours later when a white baby boy with a big nose, big head, hairy back and one eyebrow was found behind the box marked MELIS and they lived happily every after.

Jim is aware of his character defects which led him to the next step… blaming his parents. Jim honors all his personality flaws, for without them he would have no personality at all. He has realized that all of him is beautiful….even the ugly, stupid, and disgusting parts. His father once told him that his great intuition makes up for his lack of good judgement.

 

I can also hook you up with a short, fat, guy with a hair back.