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260: Shaking the Jimmy Gene, Less Productive after Securing a Mate?

  • Broadcast in Psychology



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In today's show, Dr. Howk dicusses:

1. I am a fairly successful artist in his late 20s (definitely another Jimmy the Guitar player). My Big Five is highly distorted (O-98, C-75, E-98, A-15, N-98), which has gotten me in all sorts of trouble but luckily, my high IQ has kept me on the right track. Your podcast and website have helped me in almost every arena, but I can't shake my Jimmy gene. I find myself "falling in love", but losing interest just as quickly. This has caused many unhappy romantic relationships, sometimes even when I desperately want them to work. How can a Jimmy who would love to pair bond beat his genes? Is there a ten paid dates rule for men? What is the right environment, if I can't change my personality?

2. I'm a young male adult (~20), and I truly enjoying studying, working out, training, and just overall being productive. I know it's because I'm trying to gain mate value and climb social structures, but I truly enjoy it.  Now, I recently aquired a girlfriend, and I've found that I'm more attracted to bouts of watching youtube videos for a few hours at night before I go to bed, or just generally not being productive. I've had problems here and there, but most of the time I avoid the temptation altogether and it works well. But the energy to stop relaxing and start working once I'm there is more than I'm willing to muster, it seems. It may be that this is just how I feel right now in life, and in a month or two I'll be more productive again, but do you think it's possible that now I have a mate, my brain doesn't believe I have a serious need to climb structures and gain skills? If so, that is seriously depressing.