"We're Either Together Or We're Not "

Have you ever been in a situation where a significant other is pursuing you and pulling all the right moves to get your attention? Only to become comfortable and discontinue their pursuing ways. They forget how to keep your interest. They do the bare minimum to keep you near but not enough to keep you fully engaged in the relationship.  People often make excuses, rationalize shady stuff, ignore red flags and their own needs, and basically linger or even stay rammed stuck in relationships long beyond their ‘use by date’ all on the basis of a couple of things – they’re still ‘there’ in some capacity and we assume they have ‘some’ interest that can be made into ‘more’. People resort to trying to prove themselves, seeking validation and attempting to avoid rejection by overdoing their part while their partner is underachieving at their part. One of the things that we must do, and by we, I mean both men and women because these issues do affect both sexes, is to recognize when someone is not interested or is ‘vanilla’ in their interest.

The key really isn’t to get into splitting hairs about what level of interest they have, because it all boils down to that they’re either in or they’re out, and they’re either treating you decently, or they’re not.