Love As An Obligation

How many of us were taught the meaning of real love? Most feel it had to be earned, chased or approved it before it is given leaving most of us to feel we fall short.

Should we love responsibly?

Perhaps like a driver's license, we should have to take a test, which would tell us how ready we are to love freely without obligation.

Most of us were not taught to love freely, we were taught it was an obligation; a major responsibility.

We develop a list of attachments (needy needs) when love isn't freely available:

1. Validation we're okay.

2. Being a victim to be rescued. (in the past and present)

3. Jealousy develops and we need constant reassurance.

4. Trust is earned and still never really a certainty.

5.  The need for safety and security--"to belong" is overwhleming.

6. Love doesn't feel like love, so it must be proven.

7. Rejection and abandonment feel like a birthright we may be trying to deny we feel.

And this list goes on of where we feel holes in ourselves when love has been an obligation and not given freely. Chasing ones parents for love in the form of people pleasing, proving, or overcompensating can leave us feeling love is an empty vessel that we're not good enough to have when we are adults.

Many of us settle, or get into situations where we feel like a gaping wound...feeling our neediness on steroids!

Join me to learn about this obligation, why it exists and how to shift it, so you pop out of the needy needs and into self-worth and feeling good right where you are TODAY.