We Must Stop Turning Children Against Fathers

Thousands of fathers are eliminated from their children's lives because of the 'implacable hostility' of mothers with custody. There are MANY different cases, however. To me, it reflected a phenomenon that I see all too frequently – the elimination of fathers from their children’s lives by unmitigated, unscrupulous demands on the children’s loyalty on the part of the mother with custody, along with the unremitting denigration and belittling of the father. Nine out of 10 children of separating or divorcing couples live most of the time with their mothers so the controlling parent is likely to be the woman and the estranged, undermined parent is likely to be the man. It is not unknown, however, for mothers to be on the receiving end of this process, where the children are living mostly with the father. 

I believe that both parents should share responsibility for bringing up children and 85 per cent agree that fathers are instrumental in bringing up children. The courts are often confronted with an impossible dilemma where young children voice a determined preference not to see or be involved with a parent. How can anybody be sure that the child is expressing true feelings that have been freely developed rather than a point of view which has been inculcated by a manipulative parent? 

Cases involving implacable hostility can be in and out of court for years. Prevention is better than cure.”Where contact with children is being frustrated or denied and the children themselves are rejecting a parent with whom they previously had good relationships, specialists in mediation and child psychology should get involved without delay.