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Susan Lager

The Couplespeak™ Relationship Forum


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Susan Lager is a psychotherapist, author, and relationship coach at her private practice, The Couples Center PLLC, in Portsmouth, NH. She is the Founder and Principal of Couplespeak™, the unique and innovative company providing exciting programs and vital tools for transformational relationship success. She has authored many published articles, as well as two new workbooks in The Couplespeak™ Series: "I'M TALKING! ARE YOU LISTENING?" FIX COMMUNICATION PROBLEMS WITH YOUR PARTNER IN NO TIME FLAT! is a short, humorous guide for the "do's" and "don't's" of better communication in close relationships. Her latest book "BECOME RELATIONSHIP SMART WITHOUT A LIFETIME OF THERAPY" is a useful resource for anyone wanting more joyful, meaningful relationships. Susan also gets “up close and personal” in two blogs, has produced a series of “Learn To Love” videos on her YouTube channel, and is available as a show-stopping speaker at special events in her “spare" time. You can reach her at her Portsmouth, New Hampshire office at: 603-431-7131

On-Demand Episodes

In this 15 minute episode Susan shares her insights around some financial issues couples experience, how spouses can avoid criticism, control and financial unfairness, and move toward more respectful, equitable agreements in their... more

In this 15 minute episode Susan explores the issue of a perfectionistic "all or nothing" attitude in marriage and life, and how it limits possibilities for connection, conflict resolution, and productivity, among other things. Tune into this brief... more

How do you get yourself to honor your legitimate "Shoulds"? How do you motivate yourself to do the right thing, taking care of the not-so-fun parts of your life which require attention? How do you attend to your connections and responsibilities to... more

In this 30 minute episode Susan explores the effects of 4 particular ways of handling conflict in marriage which tend to destroy respect and trust, and often lead to divorce. She also discusses alternative communication strategies which... more

In this 30 minute episode Susan explores the frequently experienced issue of standoffs or impasses in marriage - those times when couples get "locked in" to a negative sequence when nobody feels heard or acknowledged, and nothing gets... more

"You'll never finish that project!" "You're a loser!" "You're too fat and nobody will find you attractive!" "Nothing Will Ever Work Out for You!" "You're mean and selfish!" Chances are, at one point or another in time you've heard that noise in... more

In this 30 minute episode Susan sheds light on the growing epidemic of cell phone addiction. She shares with listeners key signs and symptoms of addiction, and offers a self-test for those questioning if their own use is problematic.... more

In this twenty minute episode Susan reveals the issues around our "minefields" - areas of vulnerability created by past experiences and relationships. The podcast will help you learn to identify the nature of your "mines," how to... more

In this 45 minute Couplespeak™ podcast Susan meets with Lisa McNally, a mother of three who has 20+ years of experience working with divorcing individuals, couples and families in all aspects of family law matters including... more

In this half hour episode Susan explores the issues involved with being either a clueless spouse / partner, or one who has healthy, loving partnership skills. This episode taps into emotional intelligence, how highly you would rate yourself... more
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