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Susan Lager

The Couplespeak™ Relationship Forum

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Susan Lager is a psychotherapist, author, and relationship coach at her private practice, The Couples Center PLLC, in Portsmouth, NH. She is the Founder and Principal of Couplespeak™, the unique and innovative company providing exciting programs and vital tools for transformational relationship success. She has authored many published articles, as well as two new workbooks in The Couplespeak™ Series: "I'M TALKING! ARE YOU LISTENING?" FIX COMMUNICATION PROBLEMS WITH YOUR PARTNER IN NO TIME FLAT! is a short, humorous guide for the "do's" and "don't's" of better communication in close relationships. Her latest book "BECOME RELATIONSHIP SMART WITHOUT A LIFETIME OF THERAPY" is a useful resource for anyone wanting more joyful, meaningful relationships. Susan also gets “up close and personal” in two blogs, has produced a series of “Learn To Love” videos on her YouTube channel, and is available as a show-stopping speaker at special events in her “spare" time. You can reach her at her Portsmouth, New Hampshire office at: 603-431-7131

On-Demand Episodes

In this 20 minute episode Susan explores some of the most pressing issues most of us must face "hiding from death" in the Covid19 pandemic. She discusses the seemingly mundane, like the etiquette of mask wearing in public, to the... more

In this 15 minute episode Susan discusses the issue of how we set the stage for certain outcomes with our inaction, avoidance, procrastination and denial in much the same way we shape outcomes with overt choices. These passive choices... more

In this 20 minute episode Susan shares her insights about some of the common sources of holiday related anxiety and stress, and how being proactive and intentional can transform the season. If you have a history of some really... more

In this 15 minute episode Susan discusses different coping strategies, and invites listeners to look at the origins of their tools, and how well these tools serve their purpose. The episode focuses on the importance of being more conscious and... more

In this 15 minute episode Susan shares her insights around some financial issues couples experience, how spouses can avoid criticism, control and financial unfairness, and move toward more respectful, equitable agreements in their... more

In this 15 minute episode Susan explores the issue of a perfectionistic "all or nothing" attitude in marriage and life, and how it limits possibilities for connection, conflict resolution, and productivity, among other things. Tune into this brief... more

How do you get yourself to honor your legitimate "Shoulds"? How do you motivate yourself to do the right thing, taking care of the not-so-fun parts of your life which require attention? How do you attend to your connections and responsibilities to... more

In this 30 minute episode Susan explores the effects of 4 particular ways of handling conflict in marriage which tend to destroy respect and trust, and often lead to divorce. She also discusses alternative communication strategies which... more

In this 30 minute episode Susan explores the frequently experienced issue of standoffs or impasses in marriage - those times when couples get "locked in" to a negative sequence when nobody feels heard or acknowledged, and nothing gets... more

"You'll never finish that project!" "You're a loser!" "You're too fat and nobody will find you attractive!" "Nothing Will Ever Work Out for You!" "You're mean and selfish!" Chances are, at one point or another in time you've heard that noise in... more
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