Episode 61: Distractions

How we distract ourselves

1. You are always offering to help someone with their problems

2. You offer resources you don’t have

3. You over commit

4. You anticipate others needs even before they ask for them

5. You rarely say “no”.

6. It is hard for you to tell where you end and your partner begins

7. You feel proud when you help others and crave that feeling.

8. You rarely have any time to yourself. Or alone time. - because you find it uncomfortable

9. Your children have the best of everything, while you shop at thrift stores

10. You feel like people expect a lot from you! 

Why we distract ourselves

1. We have poor self image

2. We are afraid to be judged

3. There is nothing more uncomfortable than being alone

4. We feel unworthy

5. We don’t know how to take care of ourselves

6. We don’t want to appear selfish or stuck up

7. We are anxious to please

8. We fear any confrontation

9. We have boundary issues

10. We have deep compassion

Ways we can change

1. Spend time alone. No distractions.

2. Do the hard personal work

3. Recognize the impulse to help others.

4. Set up a self-care date once a week 

5. Make a list of fifty things you like about yourself

6. Do what you say you are going to.

7. Do esteemable things

8. Take an unscheduled sick day and devote that day to yourself

9. Get organized, declutter make a plan

10. Ask for help