Often we don’t discover who or what Narcissist are until after we have open ourselves up to them. This has been one of the most horrific journeys of my life. I had never come in contact with one, until the day I married a narcissist!
Individuals afflicted with with NPD feel profound loneliness down to their very core. This gnawing emptiness is the central piece of what ails them. It is an un-fillable void created by inconsistent or absence of love in their early childhood.
Of the narcissists I have known, there is a common desire to be sought after and wanted. This is why the initial stage of a relationship with them (love-bombing) can be so exhilarating. The Narcissist loves to pursue and be pursued. For both involved parties, this phase can be misconstrued as love.
Following this “honeymoon” phase the Narcissist becomes restless , because real love is a selfless emotion and a person afflicted with Narcissistic Personality Disorder is not wired to feel that way.
At this point the Narcissist begins to devalue his partner and goes back out to meet new people who may better heal his feelings of emptiness.
The individuals drawn to narcissists usually hope that their love is all that is needed to fix the sadness. Try as they may, their unconditional love and kindness cannot heal and replace the loneliness of the narcissist.
We are generally raised to think ”Love conquers all”, but in the case of Narcissistic Personality Disorder, it is sadly not enough. Although their heart is a lonely hunter, my empathy had at last run out.