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Show Notes

• Archived Blog Post

  Date / Time: 4/11/2009 9:04 PM UTC

  News Update
  

  The latest details on last nights disastrous use of the Bush weather machine are still sketchy.  The official government line is that the weather machine does not actually exist.  The Teleprompter mistyped yesterday when he instructed President Obama to issue the statement that he inherited the machine, and the scheduled forum on the issue has been canceled. 
  
  It is now being released that the freak snowstorms earlier this week, and the tornadic thunderstorms last night are Mother Earth's response to man-made global warming.  Al Gore has issued the statement that we must immediately stop driving SUVs, stop breeding cows, and get rid of our nuclear weapons (because they would cause massive global warming).
  
  Pyong Yang has been silent on the issue.  The leaders of Russia and China agree with Mr. Gore.  The leaders of the EU have expressed a desire for another summit, and are assuring their citizens that the devastation of the South Eastern United States is all the fault of America.  President Obama has concurred with that message, and apologized once again for our arrogance and prosperity.  He has renewed his vow to eliminate those issues in his next 100 days.
  
  As for the South East, much of the power in the region has been restored.  The Pursuit of Happiness is glad to report that we will join you again tonight for our regularly scheduled program time.  Please join us at midnight for Tales from the Teleprompter, barring any further use of the Bush weather machine, oops, I meant further displays of Mother Earth's displeasure, or visits from Mr. Gore.
  
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