Narcissists, Phone Calls and Emotional Hostages: Proving You're Not Crazy

Picture this. Your narcissist is standing in front of a room full of co-workers or friends, and you call him/her about something you need to ask him/her or info you need to pass along.

As the phone rings, he or she groans and says to the people in the room, "Oh GOD! Not this again..."

Begrudgingly picking up the phone, he/she says, "Hello?" ever so sweetly.

You say hi and say whatever you have to say - and before you know it, the narcissist is saying strange things - things that don't make logical sense in the conversation and that don't seem to be responses to what you're saying.

Next thing you know, the narc seems enraged or offended, and is saying stuff like, "You're crazy!" Or "Geez, you're so paranoid/controlling/bitchy/lazy/desperate/etc." And the more you try to convince the narc that you're really not trying to offend him/her and that you just wanted to see if they'd stop by the store and grab a gallon of milk on the way home (or whatever), the more he/she seems to ramp up the bullshit.

Suddenly, you hear him/her tell you "I've had enough! Don't talk to me. I don't think I'm coming home tonight," or whatever version of that seems to hurt you the most, and then the phone goes dead.