"How do I get the same type of increase that Word of Faith ministers claim t

“I am here to answer a question which has eluded many people through the years.  The question is this:  How do I get the same type of increase that Word of Faith ministers claim to get when I donate money to them?

In these ten simple steps, I’ll tell you how:

1. First, you must fully embrace the Word of Faith doctrine and be willing to teach it.  Careful though, you must set aside sound biblical precepts and teach prosperity.  You can not teach God’s strength through weakness.  You can not teach faith in financial hard times.  You can not teach the sufficiency of God’s grace in loss.  You can only teach health, wealth, and prosperity.
2. You must find an audience who will give you a platform in order to speak. 
3. You must be willing to demand cash or checks from the audience.
4. You must have an audience to fleece money from.
5. You must tell the audience that God’s annointing is worth whatever you’re willing to pay for it…but be sure to stay away from FAITH, REPENTENCE, and OBEDIENCE.  Those will empty out your audience, and you’ll have less people to milk.
6. You must have an audience to fleece money from.
7. You must hope and pray that said audience does not read Scripture, and rightly divide the Word of Truth.
8. You must have an audience to fleece money from.
9. You must be willing to take money from the sick and dying, widows, orphans, and poor.

And, last but not least, number 10….

10.  You must have a biblically illiterate audience to fleece money from.

Any more questions?”