Our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy have changed. We think you'll like them better this way.

Pathways4Parents

Dr. Phil Advice (read more by visiting http://www.drphil.com/articles/article/48)

The idea behind parental discipline is to ultimately create self-discipline within your child. That means the kid has to learn something -- your value system and the difference between right and wrong -- that will guide him or her throughout life.

So what do kids learn from being spanked? The hitting itself doesn't teach them anything. Whether you believe in physical punishment or not, Dr. Phil has some disciplining tips and alternatives to spanking:

  • Don't take out your frustrations while spanking. Ask yourself if the spanking is truly warranted because of the child's behavior, or whether it's an excuse for you to have an adult temper tantrum? Are you more prone to spank when you are in a bad mood?

  • There needs to be a sense of calmness and order in the house. If you are spanking your kid for being physical and chaotic, aren't you adding to the physical chaos by being physical and violent with your child? What are you teaching them?

  • Make a commitment to your child's discipline. You have to do what you say you're going to do. Consequences should be highly predictable for your child.

  • Define your child's currency. What does he/she value? You can withdraw a positive (take away a favorite toy) or introduce a negative (giving a time-out) event -- but be consistent.

  • Develop a child-level logic. For example, kids know that you are less likely to discipline them in public, so that's where they'll act out.

  • When you have a confrontation with your kid -- don't ever lose! They will miss out on the opportunity to learn an important lesson if you cave in and let them get away with a behavior that is unacceptable.

  • Two things you should NEVER say to your child if you want him/her to behave are: "I'll give you something to cry about," and "Wait until your father gets home." Children can see through idle threats and will eventually ignore them. They will also take advantage of the fact that one parent doesn't want to deal with doling out the discipline and tries to hand it over to the other parent.

  • Negotiate a disciplinary plan with your spouse in calm waters. Calm parents make calm children.


    1. Today's Best
    2. Top Shows
    3. Best of BTR
      1. Loading

        The Flash – Finale Talk

        Scott Kolins has drawn The Flash for DC Comics, so he provides a unique perspective. Between TV, a potential movie, & a legacy in comics, the Flash is a rich topic to kick off this new podcast.

      2. Appropriate Emoji

        Ann's visit to RuPaul's DragCon, men and housework, women in flats, the gross faux food Soylent, how white people are using the new multiracial emoji and the amazing life (and death) of Sandra Bem.

      3. Comedian Craig Shoemaker

        Craig Shoemaker is an American comedian, writer, and voice actor. He is best known for his baritone-voiced character, The Lovemaster, which he routinely portrays in his comedy act.

      4. Paranormal Legend Rosemary Ellen Guiley

        America's Most Haunted Radio Speaks with Paranormal Legend Rosemary Ellen Guiley

      5. Why You're in a Rut.

        Indie Parents are moms and dads who are self-employed, entrepreneurs, followers of passions and require a flexible lifestyle. In "When You're in a Rut", Amy and Des chat about the common ways that business owners get stuck and ways to pull out of it.

      6. BABIP and Hitters to Trade or Trade For

        Rich will review the most misunderstood and poorly used sabermetric tool BABIP. He'll also provide a number of hitters that are overperforming and underperforming their BABIP and are do for a correction.

      7. Which Hogwarts House Are You In?

        If you were in a Hogwarts house, which one would you be in?

      8. The One & Only Palmilla

        This week's episode of Travel Today with Peter Greenberg comes from The One&Only Palmilla in Los Cabos, Mexico.

      9. Mock Draft Madness

        http://cdn.btrcdn.com/pics/hostpics/a3e28687-fda8-474f-b6ac-4d7ae88ab177_pff_radio.jpg

      10. Hot Dog, Sandwich or Not

        Jonathan, Nick, and Kyle discuss if a hotdog is or is not a Sandwich. They talk about mis-pronuncing the Eastern Confrence final, and the Tampa Bay Lightning in the playoffs thus far.

      11. Ride the Magical Dolphin

        Join Jeff Adams and Kris Cruz as they talk current events and what happen over the weekend! Plus one of the weirdest show ever by The Jeff Adams Show casts.

      12. WBC Heavyweight Champion Deontay Wilder

        Real Fans Real Talk with current WBC Heavyweight Champion Deontay Wilder

      13. Civil War Talk and S.H.I.E.L.D. Season

        Matt and Jeff discuss all the events of Season 2 of Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D. plus all the news coming from the set of Civil War which is filming now!

      14. Batman Mad Love

        The Pull Bag we are kicking off the second annual BATMAN MONTH by exploring the psychology of Mad Love!

      15. Stroke Awareness and Sunscreen Basics

        A sudden numbness in your face, difficulty speaking, a severe headache. These are signs and symptoms of a stroke. Each year, nearly 800,000 people in the U.S. have a stroke. May is Stroke Awareness Month and on the next Mayo Clinic Radio, neurologist Dr. Robert Brown, Jr., talks about diagnosis and treatment of stroke.

      16. Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome

        Today on Weekend At The Movies What’s next in the world of the X-Men, a slew of trailer talk and our main review, finishing up the Mad Max Trilogy with Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome Box Office.

      1. Loading

        Small Business Unstuck

        Host Barry Moltz gets small businesses unstuck. He has founded and run small businesses with a great deal of success and failure for more than 15 years. This is a business radio show where he shares all the craziness of small business. It’s that craziness that actually makes it exciting, interesting and totally unpredictable.

      2. America's Most Haunted

        Official Internet radio show of forthcoming epic paranormal investigation book by Eric Olsen and "Haunted Housewife" Theresa Argie.