Stop Child Abuse Now (SCAN) - 891

Tonight's special guest is Angel Holahan from Aurora Colorado, a survivor and activist. Angel was about 4 when a very close friend of the family and babysitter decided he was going to violate her vioently. She remembers bleeding, how much it hurt and her emotions towards him. "Not knowing what just happen or why," she writes, "I remember thinking that somehow it was my fault .. like I had done something horrible .. and I remember his voice telling me if I ever told anyone he would hurt my family. And I believed him." She goes on, "My step dad and mom said I wasn't myself after that." She lost her innocence to this man and though she was so young it destroyed her for years and years. "I got into doing drugs and drinking a lot. The one thing I could never do was have sex with anyone. For the longest time the idea of someone even looking at me in a sexual way horrified me," Angel says. She still has her struggles. "I have suffered PTSD and depression from it. I deal with nightmares constantly and I have constant anxiety." But she's healing now and working through her problems. Her fiance has shown her how to trust and accept love, and she has a renewed faith and couldn't be more happy. She now has a 4 month old son. "I don't blame my family for what happened. I was just too young to understand what happened to me and why anyone would let it. I understand that now that I'm older," she admits. "I guess it just makes it worth talking about knowing it can help others too."