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ACOA's don't recognize that their need to be validated is so strong--that they sometimes seek to control others through care-taking for them--to induce a sense of 'need'--so that others never leave them.
To stop the insanity wheel from spinning--we ACOA's need to take accountability for our own happiness--by accepting self--and others--without expecting others to fulfill our needs--or help maks wounds they didn't create.
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It's good to talk.