On December 1st, I interviewed career expert Susan Whitcomb about several of the “yes buts” or “golly wobbles” that keep people from living lives of “glorious success and satisfaction.” We discussed the “yes buts” of time, finances, identity, and the chief culprit—fear. A consummate professional coach, Susan advised us to step into a future life, imagining what it would look like if our dreams were fulfilled. “Our dreams,” Susan said, “hold the clues to our life journey.” She asked us to consider questions such as: (1) What dream have we put on the back burner? (2) What is our secret wish that would dramatically change the way we live or work? (3) At the end of our life, what would we regret not doing? (4) If we lived a life of “no regrets,” what would that bring to us and to our loved ones?Susan’s Coaching Suggestions1. Write out, draw a picture or create a collage showing what you really, really want in your life/work.2. Post this description some place where you’ll see it regularly.3. For a short period of time (4-5 days), observe your mind and heart’s response! Be aware of your internal “chatter” about this vision … where are the “yes-buts” coming up? Note them specifically.4. After your observation period, take some time to look at the “yes-buts” and rewrite “yes-ands” for each one. For example, “yes, but I don’t have the money to do this” can become “yes, and we could sell our second car and get by on one” or “yes, and I could get a part-time job working virtually in the evenings to help save money for this.”Take Action:1. Identify one step that you will take in the next three days that will take you closer to your ideal life/work.2. Enlist support: you are seven times more likely to succeed with an accountability partner at your side. Trained coaches are the best for this process!3. Put a perseverance plan in place. Here are several questions to keep you focused:* What do you need to say “no” to?* What do you need to reprioritize?* What will happen if you don’t devote time to this?* How much time will it take you to ______[fill in blank with an important task for your purposeful life]? Where is that time in your schedule? When’s the best time of day to do that task?* Where do you notice the “yes-buts” creeping back into your thinking? This may be your conscience/ego working to keep you safe. Acknowledge the “yes-buts” then start LOOKING for the provision for your need. It’s out there!* Who do you need to become to step into this new way of being/living/working?Susan’s Quote for the Day“The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you are not going to stay where you are.” ~John Pierpont Morgan
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