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Marvin Marshall - PARENTING WITHOUT STRESS

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REWIRING YOUR BRAIN

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Marv was on August 12th and discussed discipline in schools.This is "Discipline Without Stress, Punishments or Rewards," From a parent.I realized that if I was going to use his approach in my classroom, I should try it at home first. Creating an environment that was stress-free really appealed to me. I talked to my children about how stressful things had been at home and shared with them a little bit about the program that I was "trying out" on them. ??Later that day, I heard my daughter slamming doors and screaming at the top of her lungs at her brother. Before, I would have stormed in to intervene and quickly react to the situation without even thinking. Instead, I calmly began using such questions as, "Is what you are doing something that is beneficial?" ?My daughter stopped and looked at me and said, "Oh, this is that discipline thing you are using at school, right? Okay, so, no! No, it is not." ?I asked, "Is what you are doing something that falls in line with the standards of our family?" She sighed, "No." I said, "Would you tell me what our family rule is regarding yelling?"?She said that yelling was not allowed and that if we had anything to say we could say it in a calm manner "Well, what do you think we should do about this?" I told her to go to her room and reflect on what we should do. She came back and asked to talk to her brother. She apologized for yelling at him and proceeded to give us a list of consequences that she had decided on. "I guess I  should not use the computer for three weeks, or talk on the phone, or go to the movies with my friends." ?We were stunned! Honestly, this was the first time that she had really accepted responsibility for something so calmly. The next three weeks were very interesting. Since using this in our home, life seems so much more enjoyable. The truth is that our children do know what is expected of them. Holding them to a higher level of responsibility has made all of our lives more peaceful.

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