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Failure to Launch - Men's mental health w/Tom and Paul

  • Broadcast in Politics
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Join Alison, Paul Elam and Tom Golden as we look at some letters sent to us by our listeners discussing men's mental health.


Letters from the show:

Ryan H. writes:


Hello, badgers. I'm a 23 year old white man, and I have had a solitary mind since I was young. That is to say, I have had to rely on myself to try to craft the man who I was to become, who I wanted to become. Anyone who knows me now, and any who could find that little nugget in my younger brain that was to be a template of what I thought I might become, would find several (thousand) flaws between the two images. 


This isn't a sob story, and I don't mean to make it out to be. I grew up without a father for much of my life. I met my stepfather when I was ten, but at that point, I was already well on my way to a downward spiral of ineptitude and disappointment in myself. I love my stepfather, he's a good man and a good father, and I don't blame him at all for how I've ended up, but throughout my life, I have never had a positive, male role model.


What I have done, is I have begun to cast a mold as I am still sculpting it, and the results have been disastrous; though I am intelligent, I have flunked out of community college no less than twice. Though I am more outgoing and witty than most, I find myself with a small handful of friends (only three, really) one of whom is like a brother to me, and is facing charges of continuous sexual abuse of a minor. I have only had one girlfriend in my life, and I barely knew what to do, and I ended up being the 'nice guy' boyfriend, and I bailed before I could make a mistake.


I say all of this because it's the antithesis of who and what I WANTED to be. And still want. Today, at work, while listening to old songs that I enjoyed, I rediscovered Meatloaf, and the persona he uses within his songs (specifically Bat out of Hell and Paradise by the Dashboard Lights.) Listening to these songs