Is it realistic to think that a "Independent" black woman would NOT display selfish traits in their

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Is it realistic to think that a "Independent" black woman would NOT display selfishness traits in their relationship?
 

Member Question
I am a single woman without children, educated, successful within my career, with my own home, and cars. I am dating, and have been told by a few men that they know I'm independent, but I am also "selfish". Selfish because I'm 32 and I've never been married(engaged but he cheated and a child was produced from that) and I don't have any children. I never said that I didn't want to have children. I am just goal oriented and growing up I was focused on school and being productive in my career field. Now that I'm back on the dating scene, which I have been for a few years I've come across men with too many children for my standards, married men, and men that expect me to take care of them. There has also been a few decent guys, but there wasn't any chemistry, mental stimulation, or physical attraction. So when did setting goals and accomplishing them versus bringing a child into this world not financially, mentally, or emotionally ready become negative? What makes me "selfish"?

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