full stories in link http://www.mental-health-today.com/bp/story.htm ...... My ups and downs cycle in average two-three month patterns, where for the first couple of months I'm in a hypomanic state, going outside everyday, shopping and spending excessive amounts of money, wearing makeup, and losing a large amount of weight caused by anorexia, feeling invincible, and then the next couple of months I'm back to locking myself up inside the house, binge eating, gaining lots of weight, crying, and completely cutting off all my connections with the outside world. Due to this unstable cycle I have dropped regular school and had to take up homeschooling, lost all friends, have been unable to work for an allowance, and feel worthless and hateful toward myself most of the time. I have never actually seriously attempted to hurt myself, but have thought of death many times.....