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I hate midgets. I might be a little biasised as I once got into a knockout drag down bar brawl with one. They all seem to have a chip on their 8 year old boy shoulders. I did nothing to anatagonize the situation. The man just jumped me for simply no other reason for giving him noogies and calling him "daddy's little Time Bandit." Then he just jumps me...after removing my drink from his head (I was using him as an automan). It struck me later, after I pulled out of his wife, I guess he really did have a point about my behavior being offensive. I really should have listened to him...although in my defense, it is a little hard to make out what someone is saying as you sling them around the room by their ankles like a well worn 20 year old Cabbage Patch doll.
They may be small on stature, but midgets...ahem excuse me, "wee peoples" have made numerous contributions to the film world over the years...and I don't just mean as elves in Christmas movies. Really that's only about 98% of their range. The other 2% goes to playing little creeps and sex deranged weirdos. This week we discuss a handful, and they do fit in your hand, of movies starring the funniest of God's jokes...if of course you exclude Progeria.