Dawn Watts  

If you're going through a breakup that you don't want you might be wondering how you can get back with your ex.  Are there really any "get him back secrets" and if so, what are they?

If you are looking for some relationship secrets I've got good news and I've got bad news.

The bad news is that there aren't, at least as far as I've ever heard, any secret techniques to get back with your ex.  There are no secret potions or love spells or magic tricks that will bring your ex back crawling on his hands and knees just pleading with you to take him back.

The good news is that you don't need secrets.  All you need is an easy to follow, simple step by step "road map" that you can use to reconcile with your ex.  If you find a good plan and follow it, even though it may be hard sometimes to stick to, the results that you get might have you believing that it was magical after all!

If you truly want to get back with your ex the first thing you need to do, even though this is going to sound weird, is to stop talking to him.  If you are constantly contacting him this will likely backfire for a few reasons:

1) He won't be able to miss you.  You want him to start to doubt his decision to end the relationship.  He needs to miss the times you spent together and the things you did.  If you're constantly trying to contact him how can he miss you?  

2) If you won't leave him alone you are just becoming an annoyance.  That is not how you want him to think of you, is it?

Another thing you have to avoid is the tendency to want to fix the relationship and change yourself so he will come back.  While it is important for you to understand what qualities you have that might need some work, you should never change who you are just to accommodate someone else.  

If the two of you aren't compatible then it's time for you to move on, no matter how painful it might be.  It's simply not healthy for you to reinvent yourself for every relationship you have and it is a good way to find yourself in one abusive relationship after another.

And last, but not least, communicate.  That doesn't mean cry, nag, beg or threaten.  That means to have an adult conversation where you can openly and honestly explain to him how you're feeling.  It's also important that you let him tell you how he is feeling too.  This isn't the time to get angry or upset over what he tells you.  This needs to be a 'safe zone' for both of you to honestly express yourself.

If you think that your relationship really is worth saving and you want " get him back secrets" than follow the list above.  This is an honest and proven way to reconcile with your love.