Date Smarter, Not Harder!  

Show Notes

• Upcoming Episodes

  Your Relationship Resume

  Ms. HeartBeat

  Date / Time: 11/29/2009 2:00 AM UTC

  Category: Romance

  Call-in Number: (347) 327-9215

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  How about we create a resume to give to new dating partners that lists our best skills, our experience at the "job", our training, education and background? How many times have you been "written up" or fired? Why would anyone want to "hire" you for their mate? What are your "salary" requirements? If you had a relationship resume, what would be on it?
  
  The call-in number is 347-327-9215. Join me to discuss the qualifications you THINK you have for the job as boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife.

  Upcoming Episodes

  12/6/2009 2:00 AM UTC - What Makes You a Girlfriend?

  12/10/2009 2:00 AM UTC - Why Do I Love a Man That Hurts Me?

  12/20/2009 2:00 AM UTC - The Warning Signs That You're Dating a Loser

• Featured Episode

  Why Black Women Should Consider Dating Interracially

  Ms. HeartBeat

  Date / Time: 11/22/2009 2:00 AM UTC

  Category: Romance

  
  

  
  Millions of White men are interested in dating Black women, and outnumber the Black women available for interracial dating several to one. A 10/2/95 article which appeared in Jet Magazine proclaimed that 57% of single White men are open to interracial dating, compared to 51% of single Black women. Almost half the Black female population over the age of 18 in the U.S. is single. We'll explore the nuances of love between races, what Black women need that they aren't getting from Black men, and the fears and stereotypes which may be preventing Black women from opening their arms and hearts to White men. Does love really have a color?
  Cheryl Y. Judice, Ph.D., is a sociologist and professor of African American Studies at Northwestern University and the author of the only scholarly treatise on black females with White men entitled "Interracial Relationships - Black Women and White Men."
  Karyn Folan is the author of a soon to be released book on the same subject entitled "Don't Bring Home A White Boy and other Notions that Keep Black Women From Dating Out." Karyn feels that "Black women aren't doing anything 'wrong' as far as dating goes... but the math is against us if we're only looking at black men. We outnumber them in some major cities at a ratio which some experts say could be as high as 10:1. That means we have two choices: look beyond race for romantic partners or remain single."
  Cicely J. is the author of the soon to be released book Black Men vs. White Men – The Black Woman's Choice. Cicely feels that more and more Black women are falling for their Mr. Right in the form of blonde hair and blue eyes because Darnell, DaQuan, and Tyrone are not equipped to meet her halfway.
  Join me and my guests as we discuss the pros, cons and controversy associated with interracial relationships between White men and Black women!

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• On Demand Episodes           16303          

  Original Air Date: 8/20/2009 1:00 AM UTC

  How Religion Messes Up the Minds of Black Men

  
  Since the majority of Black Americans are affiliated with some branch of Christian religious doctrine, we must look at Christianity as the root cause of many of the problems in the Black community. Black men have messed up minds and belief systems because they demand that Black women subjugate themselves. What would we do that for? How is religion and male dominance helping Black women in 2009? This is the #1 topic on the table for this broadcast. With Black churches filled primarily with women, is the Pastor in a position to teach equality and understanding and responsibility to men, or are they instead brainwashing women into accepting misogynistic treatment by men as the norm? Is this really the kind of relationship that Black men expect? Could this be the real reason Black women are not marrying... they refuse to place themselves under the foot of a male that believes he is superior to women? Should Christians date non-believers? Why would a man in 2009 think its okay to use the Bible as justification to control and abuse women? That's my stance - what's yours? My guest is Dr. Darrel Ray, author of the new book "THE GOD VIRUS - HOW RELIGION INFECTS OUR LIVES AND CULTURE." Find out more about his him and his book at http://www.thegodvirus.net
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  • Tags:
  • Darrel Ray
  • christianity and black men
  • The God Virus
  • christian dating
  • religious control of women
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• Date / Time: 8/6/2009 4:51 PM UTC

  Feminism and The Black Man's Movement

  For some reason, Black men seem to feel a woman who describes herself as "a feminist" is a male basher that hates men. To these fellows, a woman who would dare upset the well estblished imbalance of power by requesting an equal share, respect and opportunities for females is viewed as someone whose goal is to destroy the Black family, and Black men in particular. Nothing could be further from the truth.
  
  Taking a stand against male oppression and fighting for women to have the right to make choices for her own life does not mean that such a woman is against you. Being pro-woman does not mean that one is anti-male.
  
  According to the dictionary, feminism is "the movement for the full social, political and economic equality of all people." When viewed in those terms, how could any decent man be against the feminist movement?
  
  For thousands of years, society has been constructed to place men in a position of superiority over women. Our social structure has placed males in control, which means men have conveniently had things their way for generations. Men have been judge jury and executioner over what is right and wrong for women generations. Men will of course resist and resent any female that would have the gall to say that the old way ain't benefitting her, so she has no interest in participating in that system.
  
  Why I Decided to Become a Feminist
  I am compelled to write this post after many months of listening to Black men complain about "the natural order of things" as they relate to Black women subjugating themselves to men. That, along with the Biblical quotes used to justify persecution of adult women and the sexuality of both women and girls inspired me to investigate the reasons so many Black men felt entitled to have things the way they wanted.
  
  Several blog posts followed including The Male Struggle for Control of Female Sexulity, Are Black Men Judgmental Haters of Black Women?, and the upcoming radio broadcast How Religion Messes Up the Minds of Men. The last straw was delivered to my e-mail box in the form of a link to an Internet radio program.
  
  The guest was a middle aged Black man who purports to be a leader in the men's rights movement. What possible rights could men want that they don't already have? I wondered to myself. I clicked the link only to be saddened and dismayed at the majority of the guest's statements, as they expressed a toxic anger and deep rage at Black women.
  
  Let The Shit Fly
  The guest led off the interview by expressing his belief that the Black woman has failed to address the needs of Black men, especially her own sons. He provided no facts to back up his rather brash statement. Nor did he elaborate on which needs men have that Black women failed to address, but he didn't need to. The statement was like throwing gasoline on an already burning fire, and was enough to start the finger pointing and blaming of Black women by the Black male callers, which proceeded unabated throughout the 2 hour show.
  
  I continued to listen as he railed on, stating that all hell broke loose in America when the 1970s feminist movement came into being. His opinion was that all the dysfunction in the Black community, the collapse of every institution such as our churches, schools, families and communities was due to the distortion of gender roles brought about by feminists. He felt Gloria Steinheim's statement: "a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle" was a declaration of gender war.
  
  Let me stop here and interject my thoughts.
  
  When the honorable guest spoke of what Black women failed to do for Black men, I wondered where the Black men were in this equation. I mean, on one hand women are angrily charged with failure when we TRY to raise a young black man. We're told "a woman cannot raise a boy into a man!" But we try valiantly anyway, since Dad is nowhere around, preferring his crack pipe, White woman, or his boyz to the day to day responsibility of his son's psyche and success in life.
  
  "This is where Black women have failed!" he shouts. "Black women are not raising their sons into good Black men!"
  
  To read the rest if this article, log onto http://www.survivingdating.com/?p=919
  
  • Tags:
  • black men
  • feminism
  • black feminists
  • religious oppression
  • oppression of women
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