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Mentoring, Writing, History, Promoting, Dreaming, Goal-Oriented, Basketball, Working Out, Movies, Plays, Great Music. Please visit my website at www.newrevolutionpublications.webs.com for further details on me and what I do. If you've enjoyed what you've read, please visit paypal.com and donate whatever money you find it in your heart to give. Make donations to alberta_parish@yahoo.com through paypal.com. Thank you very much.
Date / Time: 9/11/2008 6:59 AM UTC
September 9, 2008
Perpetuators of abuse often never change even as they grow older. Someone who was verbally abusive twenty years ago is still verbally abusive today. Just like the schoolyard bully, abusive people are often cowards and when you stand up to these individuals, they tend to be either openly hostile to you or they ban you from their social circle. This means you may never again get an invitation to come over to their house for dinner, especially during the holidays. You stood up to the abuser! Now, he or she doesn't know how to handle you and if the abuser doesn't know how to handle you as the abuser has in previous years, he/she no longer feels like they can deal with you. He/she no longer wants to deal with you.
What is abuse? Abuse, whether physical, emotional or verbal, can rear its ugly head through anything or anyone whether it is a spouse, relative, or your so-called best buddy. Abuse can be as simple as someone consistently having negative comments to say to you and about you (specifically to your face). Have you ever known a relative who always had a negative comment for you every time you saw him/her? Have you ever known someone who's always had very negative or unfounded opinions of you and felt too free in letting you know just how much he/she disapproves of you? Well, this is a form of verbal abuse.
When you mention the word 'ABUSE', most people tend to focus more on physical and sexual abuse. However, verbal abuse, which is an offspring of emotional abuse, is not to be easily discarded as if it is something that is all in a person's head. There are serious problems that arise from verbal/emotional abuse. Verbal/emotional abuse can be anything from a partner cheating on you constantly to being constantly berated and belittled for every thing you do or don't do. This means, nothing you ever do is good enough in the eyes of the abuser. See, the abuser is really an insecure person, and also extremely jealous. Therefore, he/she has to find something wrong with you so that he or she can feel better about himself/herself, because they see someone else's life more screwed up than theirs. An abuser would also rather see you work like a slave on a dead end job than see you succeed in your own business, whether that business is you being an author/writer, entertainer, small business owner, or entrepreneur.
As true cowards, abusers often pick on those that are truly defenseless, which are mostly children. Unfortunately, most children who experience verbal abuse doesn't always first experience it from other children, they experience it first in the home. They experience it first from relatives. Domestic violence does not just include the physical beating and/or torturing of a partner and children; domestic violence also includes verbal abuse, which may come in the form of verbal threats against a person's physical being, or unjustified harsh scolding concerning a person's character or even his/her physicality.
Although I was fortunate enough to have a loving and non-abusive mother, I still experienced verbal/emotional abuse growing up. Today, I can look people straight in the face, say what I have to say to that person whenever he/she crosses the line with me, and be done with it. As a child, I couldn't do this. You know, when you're a child, you don't always have a voice to let people know that they're hurting you by their ill treatment of you. A child doesn't always have a voice to say, "I don't like how you talk down to me, treat me like I'm unimportant, and say mean things to me all the time." Because a child is often intimidated by his/her abuser, that child may never utter a single word to anyone outside the home about what he/she experiences inside the home on a regular basis. I believe this is one reason why when children get to school, they act out all day in their classrooms. Sometimes, this is a testament of the turmoil that a child may be experiencing inside his/her home.
Whenever I think of an abusive person, I think of someone who's a sociopath. Only an abusive sociopath would continue to perpetuate abusive behavior whether they perpetuate it in the home, against you, or in the workplace. Workplace bullies are abusive people period! Only an abusive sociopath would think that he/she has done nothing wrong, and feels that he/she owes no apology. Only an abusive sociopath would continue to perpetuate abusive actions toward people they've already hurt in some way. Yet, there are people like this occupying our personal space each and every day. And we continue to deal with them, because some of them are our friends, relatives, or a spouse. Where do you draw the line in the sand with these people? At some point, you have to. And when you do, be prepared to fight (I don't mean physical beating because you're an adult now). Just like the schoolyard bully, you have to put an abusive sociopath in his/her place. You have to say to yourself, "I'm not gonna take this crap anymore." You're going to have to stand up for yourself when it comes to an abuser whether this is family, a spouse, a friend, or your supervisor.
Order Now THE EVIL WITHIN HIM at Amazon.com, BN.com, BAMM.com, Target.com, Borders.com, Jump.co.za, or Buy.com.Alberta Parishwww.freewebs.com/albertaparishwww.revolutionizedwriterbookclub.ning.com
Date / Time: 9/3/2008 1:30 AM UTC
Surviving Childhood Abuse by Alberta Parish
August 10, 2008
Many adults that have experienced childhood abuse can sometimes lead normal lives, especially if they’ve learned how to cope with the traumas that accompany childhood abuse. However, there are those who still deal with the pain, humiliation, neglect, sexual abuse or physical abuse they’ve experienced as children. And these issues often manifest themselves in every facet of their adult lives, whether private, professional or social. Have you ever known someone who is always angry or withdrawn? Have you ever known someone who is afraid to commit? Have you ever known someone who has a fear of intimacy? Have you ever known someone who is verbally abusive? These are often signs of much bigger issues. Many times, it’s not about you. It is the about the turmoil, confusion, anger, regret, or unforgiveness that this individual carries around as his or her emotional baggage. It is about what this person’s been feeling on the inside for years.
Depending on the severity of psychological, sexual or physical abuse that a child experiences, some of these individuals may never lead normal lives as adults. Serial killers have even been created from the severity of sexual, physical, and emotional abuse they endured as children. It is a known fact that when you starve a child of tenderness, affection, and unconditional love for years and you hurl insults at him on a regular basis, as an adult he may be mentally withdrawn or verbally abusive with the people that care the most about him. He may even be a sociopath. Not all sociopaths are serial killers. Some sociopaths seem like normal people in public. However, if you hang out with a sociopath behind closed doors, you may see more than what you wanted to see. These people are often your coworkers, family members, a boyfriend or girlfriend, or your next-door neighborhood.
What is a sociopath? A sociopath has antisocial behaviorism, and displays no remorse in his/her antisocial behavior toward others. This individual lacks empathy for someone’s pain or loss. For example, if you had a close friend that slept with your husband and didn’t show an ounce of remorse for what he or she did, this person could be defined as a sociopath. If a family member sexually abused you as a child and is walking around today like nothing ever happened, this person could be defined as a sociopath.
A person who has experienced childhood abuse doesn’t always possess the will power to forgive and move on with their lives, which is why many of them seek the professional services of counselors, life coaches, or therapists. Any help is better than no help at all.
Date / Time: 9/3/2008 1:28 AM UTC
Modern Slave Labor by Alberta Parish
August 19, 2008
Today’s job market can be very complicated for individuals with no education beyond high school or minimal education. This is why it is imperative that parents instill in their children the value of a good education, because it could mean the difference between working a dead-end job, having a decent-salary career, and even being a business owner. There are so many people that have jobs that they absolutely hate. Either they hate the salary, job environment, the labor involved, or their sociopathic bosses. Instead of them going back to school, they’d rather work two or three dead-end jobs. Then sit around and complain about how much they hate working where they are. Some of these same individuals don’t possess any goals to do anything with their lives other than what they’ve already been doing for years, which is NOTHING.
The reason I became an author with my first self-published book in 2002 is because I knew that this was what I wanted for my life. I knew that I didn’t want to continue working a 9 to 5 until I retire in my sixties, if I even lived long enough to do that. I had big dreams and aspirations for my life. Still do. This is why I become discouraged sometimes with my present situation, because I know that I’m not in a good financial situation to just walk away from my day job. The economy is in a recession right now, so it wouldn’t do me any good to walk away from my current position when I don’t have adequate employment lined up someplace else or when I have very little money saved up in my bank account. Luckily for me, I have the skill set to apply for better employment with the company I currently work for; better employment that will pay me a decent salary and that I can have normal hours with.
In today’s slave labor market, you should have at least several options. What I mean by this is learn skill sets that you can apply in different job fields. For example, if you’re a truck driver and you hate your job, start taking computer courses such as Microsoft Word, Microsoft Excel, PowerPoint, Graphic Design, etc. Apply for an administrative job with the same trucking company you work for. Don’t just complain all the time about how much you hate driving. At least do something to change careers and possibly earn far more money than what you earn now. If your job is emotionally and physically draining, then perhaps you should go into a different field of employment. Sometimes this may require you going to a city college, and getting an Associate’s or Bachelor’s Degree so you can move forward with your life. Perhaps you may need to capitalize on the talent that you keep overlooking. That talent could be anything from entrepreneurship to writing, from baking delicious cakes to producing clothing. Sometimes people just need a little encouragement to follow their dreams and to put them into action. A lot of people don’t know how to put their dreams into action, because they lack the proper education on how to do so. This is where books come into play. If you want to know something, read a book.
Just recently, I purchased Dan Poynter’s book entitled Self-Publishing Manual, because I realize that I’m ignorant when it comes to the business of being an author. Writing and publishing the manuscript is easy. But how to market it and sell it is an entirely different ball game.
Today’s modern job market can be a beast at times. Depending upon what kind of job a person has, it can even be a distraction and/or hindrance to your own business. As an author with a day job, I’ve found this to be very true. There are just too many jobs in Atlanta that I feel are straight slave labor jobs. There are far too many slave plantations here, which is why I am looking desperately for my writing career to really take off. I want my career as a writer to take me to a different place in my life. Because what I’ve learned all these years is you won’t really get too far in life working for someone else and not having other income options.
Date / Time: 9/3/2008 1:21 AM UTC
August 29, 2008
Clayton County Schools Has Lost Accreditation by Alberta Parish
Well, it’s official! Clayton County Schools will lose its accreditation as of September 1, 2008, which was announced on Thursday, August 28, 2008 by the Southern Association of Colleges and Schools. Clayton County Schools had failed to meet eight out of nine requirements to keep its accreditation status. Four Clayton County school board members who, earlier this year, had been blamed for the school system’s accreditation problems, have been permanently removed from their positions, and thousands of students are now left to wonder what will become of their immediate futures, as many were on track to graduate from high school in June of 2009 and attend college later that year.
Coming from a family where there are currently three college graduates that I know of (myself included and two cousins), I find what happened in Clayton County to be a tragedy of epic proportions. I don’t have children, but I’m just as angry as the parents of these children. Do you realize how hard life is or can be with no education or minimal education beyond high school? I have a two-year degree, which in today’s slave labor market really isn’t all that wonderful. There are people in Atlanta with a Bachelor’s Degree that is having a difficult time finding employment in the very field that they attended college for. Therefore, many of them are often forced to take jobs that pays a considerably lower salary than what they would’ve made had they landed a job in the field that they attended college for.
Education is only part of a key to success. The other part of that key is parents instilling within their children the value of a good education.
Even if a child attends a horrible school system, he or she can still make it if his/her parents invest their time, effort, and energy into the education of that child. Even by encouraging a child to pick up a book and read, or encouraging a child to read one book per month, this alone with increase that child’s reading scores.
There are students in Clayton County with a 3.0 to 5.0 grade point average and who would’ve gotten scholarships before graduation to attend some of the best colleges/universities in the United States whose immediate futures as far as graduating on time, and getting that athletic or academic scholarship when they expected to that are now in jeopardy. Some of these students have worked too hard to see their futures or dreams deferred. Some have worked too hard to be told that their school has lost its accreditation. Some have worked too hard for three years at one high school only to be forced into another school (in a different county) just to be able to graduate on time and with an accredited diploma.
Within a year from September 1, 2008, Clayton County Schools has a chance to regain its accreditation status if current school board members meet all nine of the Southern Association of Colleges and Schools requirements, which were first reported in February of this year. It was four years ago when Clayton County Schools were first in danger of losing its accreditation. Obviously, mistakes within the school system and with its board members were never fully corrected, which eventually cost an entire school district. Not only have students been affected by this school system accreditation nightmare, but Clayton County residents and business owners have also paid the price for the errors, misjudgments, and lack of consideration for Clayton County students on the part of a few school board members.
Not all children can graduate from high school, and go straight into professional sports (as a player) or the entertainment industry (as an actor, singer, songwriter, musician or rapper). Therefore, college is really the only other option that most high school seniors across the country have (unless they were born with a silver spoon in their mouth). And even in this, most multi-millionaire families still require their children to attend college. Let’s hope that within this year Clayton County Schools regain its accreditation status so that high school seniors (who still live in the school district) can graduate with an accredited diploma in June of 2009, and go on to do marvelous things in life.
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